Hey, guys! My name’s Itxy, and today I’m going to tell you about the one thing that’ll get you to stop dreading your day.
How many times have you woken up, and thought, “Ugh, I’m really not looking forward to today because of this.”
Sometimes we wake up, and the second that we open our eyes, we’re already dreading the day because we have a person that we have to meet that we may not really like, or we have an event we have to attend to that we don’t want to attend.
Well, there is a way to stop dreading your day—cancel everything, and just stay home.
I’m just kidding.
Seriously, you do so by fueling and refueling yourself. I’ll explain what this is in a second.
First, I want to clarify that we’re not dreading whole days ahead of us. What we’re dreading is a specific event or person that we have to meet during a specific time of our day.
This is why you fuel yourself and refuel yourself. This means that on the day that you have something that you’re dreading, you set up 2 events that you’re actually looking forward to.
Let’s say that it’s tomorrow, and you’ve woken up, and you’re dreading the day because you have your best friend’s party later. But the thing is that you hate parties, but you do not not want to go because you don’t want to make your best friend sad.
So that you’re not dreading the entire day, set up an event that you’ll actually enjoy for yourself before you go to the party.
Your mind is now on the thing that you have planned before the party instead of the actual party itself.
Let’s say your party is at 8:00 PM. So that you’re not dreading it from the second you wake up, you’re going to set up something that you like at 6:00 PM.
Say that you really like reading at the library. Before you go to the party, at 6 you’re going to go to the library and read for a couple hours. From the second you wake up, that’s what you’re actually looking forward to—going to the library and reading instead of dreading the party.
The time comes and it’s 8:00, and you have to go to the party. However, instead of hating the party you’re at and being in a bad mood, now it’s actually enjoyable because you know what’s coming after the party.
Why is it enjoyable? Because you set up a time to binge-watch Brooklyn Nine Nine. There’s no way to be mad about the party because now you’re looking forward to what you have after it. This is what’s called refueling.
Now you’re home at 11:00 PM, and while you’re watching B99, instead of thinking, “Ugh, today sucked,” like you would have if you hadn’t had time to fuel and refuel, you’re going to be thinking, “Today was actually a good day.”
But if you wouldn’t have had time to fuel and refuel, then you probably would have thought that today was shit.
This simple fueling and refueling tactic is something that I learned from Vanessa Van Edwards (she studies people). I wanted to give her the credit. I did not come up with this (though I wish I would have), and I just wanted to share this with you.
WHAT TO DO WITH THIS INFORMATION
- Look at your calendar and see what you have planned
- Set something before the event that you enjoy
- Set something after the event that you enjoy
This way you can look forward to these things when you wake up instead of automatically dreading your day.
For example, let’s say that in a week you have a boring work event that you have to go to, and you’re not looking forward to it.
Set up something that you can do before hand (fuel) and something that you’ll do afterward (refuel).
It doesn’t even have to be an hour or two, it can be:
“For 20 minutes, I’m going to play my guitar before I leave,” and then afterward, “I’m going to meditate for 40 minutes.”
Whatever it is, have it be something that you enjoy because if it’s not something that you actually like, then you’re just going to end up dreading your day anyway, and there’s no point in setting up these times to fuel and refuel.
Whatever it is, just make sure that you love it and that it actually brings you joy so that at the end of the day you can actually say, “Today was a good day.”